Origin~ALL 2/3 Name Mapping: Tracing lineages & influences through etymologies
Today being Easter, I’m sharing another origin story as part of my continued re-birth each cycle.
In this time, I am in deep study and spiritual observance of what is happening within myself and in the world around us.
This week, I woke up a few morning with a tight chest and the week continued to bring news that deepens my compassion and spiritual connection to my community in Chicago and the world as I read about
Environmental injustices in Little Village, a neighborhood that I organized and grew into my adulthood in as a guest and co-struggler. I am also very troubled by the news about Chicago Jail being one of the hotspots for coronavirus and for simply existing.
I am reminded on this Easter day of how Black, Brown, Trans, Undocumented, and historically looted communities experience their own crucifixions and have to rise from the dead so many times in one life like the plants that we are. It doesn’t have to be so. I truly believe in that and that we are doing what we can in the places that we can to heal what needs to be healed. I have full faith and in that energy, I share my name and story and offering to the collective oneness - may we see our reflections in each other.
I was assigned female at birth & the following names:
First Name: Stephanie Anne
after Princess Stéphanie Marie Elisabeth Grimaldi de Monaco, my mom just really liked the name Ann and gave it to me and my sister as names except she made it my first name with an added “e” for flair.
Middle Name: Ladrera
my mom’s maiden name, an influence of Spanish traditions of keeping your father’s name that we continued through my grandfather Eduardo from Palo, Leyte in the Visayas, central region of the Philippines.
Last Name: Camba
a last name inherited from our family in Bani, Pangasinan and based on brief research comes from French, Bolivian, and Mexican origins and connections. Bani is in the North East region of the Luzon province in the Philippines.
My paternal grandfather’s actual name is Fiorelo ~of Italian origin, meaning “little flower”. I knew him as “Lolo Ray” and we weren’t friends on Facebook, but when he died in August of 2018, I felt called to find his page online.
The photo on the right is one of the only photos of us in this lifetime. We only saw each other before I moved to the Marshall Islands in 1991 (shortly after the picture above) and in 2015 when I was able to go back with Kaluluwa Kolectivo through Bayanihan Foundation’s Next Gen Program.
I will tell the story of our brief and unexpected divine meeting and that journey another day, but for now ~ I share this to show that many of us are still piecing our stories and lineages together in our own time. Some may not be able to search as far as I have and some may go farther. Through listening to names and symbols that have called to me, I found my way back home and to family even when it was/is deemed against that law.
I bought this flower before meeting up with my sisters Jean and Crystle for an event called “Pinto” we held in August 2018 thinking of sisters in my circle who were grieving their lolas and mothers, but the next day I learned my grandfather died around the same time I got this plant. So I called it “Lolo Ray”. He didn’t live long, but we did some deep work together and still do.
My first birthday in Manila a month before moving to the Marshall Islands with my mom to join my grandparents, aunt, and sister.
Matapang St., Teachers Village, Quezon City, Philippines.
Being in and of a diaspora of Pilipinx people has made me the type of person craving for any inkling of origin. I hope to contribute to the chorus and constellation of voices and stars adding to the ways we can activate and reconnect to our cultures, arts, and really ourselves holistically.
This has everything to do with trusting the stars, creator, ancestors, and guides along the way. Each of us has our own set of unique sources of influence and lineage. If you tune in closely enough you will see/hear/feel/smell/taste that no border whether man made or divine can separate you from the Universe and all that has brought you here.
I have believed since I was young that energy never dies and science continues to prove that to me over and over again. Even through the grief of this time, I am feeling hopeful and dedicated to showing my gratitude in art & action.